I remember growing up, my uncles and other elders would watch us kids as we applied chile to our food. They would always ask "what kind of Mexicans" we were if we didn't eat some. I'd do anything to "prove" I was "Mexican" enough, so I always loaded my plate. You see, my brothers and I had an Anglo last name, so anything to show our "Mexicanness" was our obsession. We often experienced being excluded, sometimes by our Chicano/ Latino peers and teachers and other times, by our white ones. As time went on, I learned that I wasn't "Mexican enough" for some Latinos, because I didn't speak Spanish. I wasn't "Mexican" enough because I wanted to live in a nicer neighborhood. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't seem to be "Mexican" enough for some people. I certainly wasn't white enough to get any special treatment, acceptance, or opportunities in life.
Now that I have grown up, I realize that not much has really changed. To people from Mexico, and even some from my own community, I'm still a "gringo." To Anglo people, I will always be a "Mexican." But I've taken the time to discover how I came to be. I have realized my ancestry, and I have embraced my true roots! I am "Mexican" enough! Yo soy CHICANO! I am man enough! I am enough!
And I love me some hot, green chile too!
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